Location: Marietta, Georgia, United States

I'm here. I love hearing the birds sing in the middle of the night and early in the morning. I like walking but I'm tired of it and wish I could ever buy a car of my very own and afford to actually drive it places. As it is now, I would maybe get a car, unlikely, but it would sit in the parking lot because I got no money to insure it and to put gas in it. So, I might sit in the car and have somewhere to go besides my apartment, but that would be about it.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Got No Money Guide to Home Security

More stickets to stave off the bad guys from your home, self and property:

* We won't be available for robbery until next year or later. This year the IRS got it all.

* Do you have any idea how many places there are that have money available? Have you noticed we don't look like we're on that list? That's because we don't have any money.

* We are consistently poor. We are okay with that. The state has made sure we have a psychologist so we can be okay with that. If you want to rob somebody, get a psychology degree. The state is paying him $120 per hour to tell use its okay to be poor as long as we're consistent and have an identity.

* We got no mo money. We bought plastic laundry baskets so we could get organized. We bought little circle tabs in different colors so we could be color-coded. We got cleaning sprays so we could clean and disinfect everything in our house. We obviously ran out of money about half way through the grocery store because we forgot to get icecream and had to put some things back. You've got to be kidding. If you robbed a street person or a senator at least you'd get their liquor money.

* My company explained to me what down-sizing means. Would you like me to explain it to you? Yes, I do have an attitude, don't I?

* Are you sure it wouldn't be easier to get a job hanging gutter or something? My mother-in-law knows lots of jobs. I know, because she keeps trying to get me one.

* When I grow up, I'm going to be rich and famous. At this rate, I'm never going to grow up. Check with me later.

* I thought about being a criminal. There couldn't be much money in it, if you're this desperate. That's pathetic.

* If I had five dollars, my kids or wife spent it already.

* Did you do your homework about this? The only thing here is dirty clothes. Help yourself. We could use all the help we can get.

* We are too poor to spit and got none to spit with. What were you thinking?

* Demographics is a big word that means to check and see how much people got before you try to go and get it from them. You might want to check our demographics. We are in the ain't got none category.

* Are you dreaming? We don't have money or anything else of value. We are dreaming that we might have something someday but you're dreaming, if you think that day is today.

* Go steal somewhere else. We are not worth the effort. We would hate to see you waste your valuable time here.

* When you got up this morning - did you engage your brain? There has never been enough money here to buy anything we could sell if we had to.


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